The great sugar experiment of 2009

Sep 23, 2009 by John    10 Comments    Posted under: Uncategorized

As I’m sure you’ve all long suspected, sachet’s of sugar are not quite what they purport to be; a spoonful of sugar. Here at Braine labs, we took 12 typical specimens and measured them up against the real deal, a spoonful of sugar. Some did better than others but not a single one contained as much sweetness as a proper spoonful. Let’s survey the evidence.

Not quite as obvious spoon by spoon, but add them all up and put them side to side…

Yes my friends. As you suspected, there is only about half A SUGAR in most sachets. They’re trying to trick that sweet sweet tooth of yours, it’s nothing but a ruse!

So the next time you’re in the canteen making a nice brew, and you’ve just poured two sachets into your cuppa… and someone goes “OOH OOH, Two sugars! Ugh. How can you!?”. You can say “Oi! No! That’s ONE sugar! I take it you haven’t heard of the great sugar experiment of 2009 yet? No? Well let me show you, but first allow me to stick this spoon up your judgemental crack and see how sweet you look.“

Nom nom

Sep 21, 2009 by John    No Comments    Posted under: Uncategorized

Anna loves her nom nom. Always asking for it. Her first words were pretty much NOM NOM NOM NOM. Tried to get a better video of it but this’ll do.

Travors minus Travors

Sep 18, 2009 by John    6 Comments    Posted under: photoshop, Uncategorized

So you’ve seen Garfield minus Garfield right? And know that it’s done by travors? And heard the phrase a taste of your own medicine? well here’s Travors minus Travors.

Click for original blog post (left), or bigger version of the photoshopped image (right). Or see the slideshow on Annie’s site.

The great quest

Sep 10, 2009 by John    6 Comments    Posted under: Uncategorized

I walked for many miles, with aching bones, creaking below my now lesser mass. Eventually my destination peaked over the horizon and gave me hope. The journey was shorter than it seemed, but it weighed heavy on my weary soul. As I grew closer my legs gave way. I crawled through the entrance and collapsed upon the canvas floor.

For a moment in time, I didn’t stir. The eve before,  slumber seemed but just a blink, sleep had merely kissed these pallid cheeks but woke me with the brush of her sweet lips.

And now, the evening after, near the end of my great quest, she embraced me, but no! I couldn’t sleep now. My mission wasn’t over, only midway. I clutched the treasure to my bosom, then placed it within my satchel. At last the child would receive the sacred cloth and be at peace.

I battled many demons on my way back. I had to step over some bodies who didn’t make it. A time later, at the end of my long  journey, I reached the queen.  And the child. The queen, who could not partake in the massive journey, for she was with child once again, eagerly sought the treasure with her eyes. It was only then that I realised, with a dawning horror that the sacred cloth was missing it’s counterpart, and would not pacify the child.

“BALLSACKS! I forgot the FUCKING wipes! Jesus! Yes I got the nappy! but I left the fucking wipes in the tent. FUCK!”

And so it was, we started the epic journey of aching legs, from the far end of Electric picnic to the campsite. I changed the nappy, got kids ready for bed. Got ready for bed myself.

And she says to me “What d’you think you’re doing!?”

“Climbing into that sleeping bag, before I collapse from sleep deprivation, and way too much walking for an unfit fucker like me!”

“What about Madness? You really wanted to see Madness!”

“There’s no way I’m going back out there! I told you, that was an epic journey for me!”

But  I was eventually convinced to put my wellies and my coat back on and traipse back out there.

I trundled on like a zombie, with aching limbs. “Gotta go to Madnesss, gotta go to Madness. gotta go to Madness”.

And THAT is how I managed to miss what by all accounts sounded like, a brilliant extravaganza of musical fun; Chic.

But I had a one track mind. Gotta go to Madness. Gotta go to Madness.

This is the song I walked by at the time.

Yes you read correctly. I could see and hear that but still kept walking, repeating the Madness mantra, and made it to the main stage. And that was that!

Madness were good fun too. But I had to endure 40 minutes of unknown new stuff while waiting for the hits, when I could have been freaking out to Chic!

Incidentally, the highlight of my weekend was the having-the-craic type Galway band The Timber Tramps, and singing along to great covers like Personal Jesus. Maybe I’ll justgo to Galway next year.

Great expectations

Sep 2, 2009 by John    1 Comment     Posted under: films

United 93 was on telly tonight. I can remember being blown away by this movie when it came out. For me, expectation can really make or break or a movie. This was a year that I had an unlimited ticket to UCG, and I’d often just walk in and take a chance on something that looked good and started soon.

That day was slim pickings, I went for what I thought was the best of a bad bunch. It was also what I thought would be some crap schmaltzy 911 hero movie. But I was completely taken by surprise.

No schmaltz. Very minimal but effective score. Very realistic acting. No big stars, and a lot of the airport controllers were the real thing, not actors. A few even played  themselves, including the main flight control guy, Ben Sliney who’s great in it.

And the tension very slowly but greatly builds, I can remember feeling like I was on that plane by the end. And was almost in shock come the ultimatum. Brilliant movie.

Doesn’t quite have the same impact on a small screen and the intrusions that come with it. And if you haven’t seen it yet I’ve probably spoilt it just by telling you how great it is.